Build Belonging
Remember that time you were in a meeting or classroom and you just didn’t feel like you belonged? The energy and motivation for learning can come from a sense of belonging. When students feel connected in a classroom community, we can activate their cognitive learning. When they feel they don’t belong, students spend more brain power being on edge than on higher-order thinking. When they feel it’s a safe environment to share their emotions, their struggles, their celebrations, they will begin to build each other up and encourage the success of their classmates. When we treat students with kindness and high expectations, they will respond well and learn together. The more we value them, the more they will respond in kind. Some students need much more support than others, but it does not mean we need to lower our expectations. We can build belonging, connection, and community into our classrooms. The same goes for the home and boardroom. Valuing a foster child, a distant relative, or a college intern goes a long way to helping create a sense of belonging. My motto “Love God Love People” reflects my understanding of our deepest need to find true belonging. In Christ, we…
Weekly Meal Planning
Is weekly meal planning too complicated or the lazy way out? Recently, a friend told me that she was too lazy to do weekly meal planning. I told her that I did weekly meal planning WHEN I was too busy or too lazy to think up new foods. For me, it’s a quick way to get 5-6 meals planned out with recipes and a grocery list. I have a few favorite go-to sites that I use and even one that’s vegetarian. On the weekend, I print out a weekly meal plan that includes recipe links and a grocery list (such as this one here). I open my calendar and match up meals to our schedule for the week, crossing out or replacing any that don’t fit our week or our taste buds. I then modify the grocery list to eliminate any items for recipes I’m not using. Lastly, I cross-check the grocery list with my fridge and pantry marking off any items I already have on hand. All that should take less than 15 minutes depending on how many rabbit trails I took when skimming the recipe links or reorganizing my pantry. My kitchen wall holds a menu board that…
Learn to say YES
Do people automatically expect you to say NO faster than you say YES? “Learn to say yes easily” was a piece of wisdom and parenting tip I came across as a young wife and parent. The wisdom behind this was that when you did need to say “NO”, it would be taken well knowing that it was not your usual answer just to avoid extra work or expenses. If possible, say YES to your kids asking to have a friend over, your students occasionally asking for more time on an assignment, your coworker asking you to lunch, or your spouse asking to play soccer one night a week. Then, when there’s a good reason to say NO it will be less of a shock or disappointment because you are known for saying YES to reasonable requests. Because our usual reason for saying NO to things with our children was typically due to scheduling conflicts, our children learned to check the family calendar before asking. This led to fewer conflicts and whining in the middle school years because it was not us saying NO because we were annoyed but because it was a schedule conflict. It also helped our children learn…
Save your NOs
Have you ever wished for a good parenting tip so your child would obey right away when you say “no” or “come”? Most parents and teachers of young children struggle with this daily until you learn to save your nos. One wise parenting tip I learned early on when my children were young was to save your NOs. It is as simple as using “please don’t” and “no” for different things. Use “please don’t” when you want your child to stop poking her sister or yelling at the cat. Save your nos for when you want your child to stop running in the street or touching a hot stove. NO can be reserved for imminent danger or direct defiance. Sure, you will probably use them interchangeably some of the time, but if you will restrict your NOs for when your child must obey immediately, you can teach your child to obey right away when you say “NO!” Delayed obedience is disobedience no matter how you phrase your request, but that’s for another blog post. When you do have to say NO, make it a teachable moment. Take time shortly afterward to talk to your child about what the danger or…
15 Parenting Books
Ever wish you had a quick list of helpful books for raising a child? Here are 15 parenting books! This list is not comprehensive nor will you agree 100% with every chapter in each book, however, it’s like a recipe. You take the basic ideas and tailor them to your family’s needs or what’s in the pantry that day. I find it much easier to modify a recipe than to make one up, wouldn’t you agree? No book list should ever replace solid Biblical truth. The best parents are those who understand that solid parenting skills come from the unchanging truth of God. They also reach out to like-minded others who are just a few steps ahead of them. A friend recently asked me for some parenting resources, and I literally went to my bookshelf and pulled off a few favorites. These are parenting books I have read or used over the years. I ask that you use discernment in whether or not they are the best resource for you. Whether you are a parent, a grandparent, a teacher, or a favorite friend, I hope this list will be helpful. It’s divided into 3 sections, and I’ve included Amazon…
In Order
Do you ever wonder why students jump around project to project without finishing it in order? Teaching students or your children to prioritize and complete projects in order is a doable goal. One easy way is to write a list of things to complete and teach them to complete projects in order. In the elementary classroom during a block of work time, I write down a list of things on the board that need to be done. I teach my students that my lists are always meant to be completed starting at the top. When you complete the first item, you move on to the second item, etc. Sometimes I draw a line dividing the top part of the list from the bottom part. This is usually a visual reminder that the things above the line must be completed and the things below the line are things to do if you get time or if you actually complete all the above. Writing lists help students visualize, prioritize, and complete projects in order. I’m not fond of long lists of things to do, but occasionally this is necessary on a “catch up” day when students are in various stages of completion…
Homework Help
Have you set yourself up for endless hours of sitting with your children and nagging them to get their homework done or having to work through every single problem with them? Homework help involves helping a child set up a structure for the time. Here are a few easy steps and homework tips to get out of the habit of nagging a child through homework. Set up a regular homework time and place. Set out school supplies in easy reach. Set expectations for that time, such as working for 15 minutes then taking a short break or completing all of an assignment before a break. Talk about eliminating distractions during homework time, such as TV watching. Depending on the age of your child, be nearby but not next to them. Or be next to them, but working on your own work. It helps develop their independence. Some children will need more gradual backing off of parental and teacher support, but the earlier you can do this the more independent they will become. I often suggest that parents let children get started on their work and ask for help when they need it rather than a parent unpacking the backpack and…
Be Honest
Do you know that honest feeling of relief you get when you just tell someone the truth? “Be honest” is one of the few rules I have for my tutoring clients. I’d rather a child tell me they didn’t turn in their homework than lie to me about the teacher losing it. Being honest allows us to get to the heart of the matter, such as lack of motivation or feeling overwhelmed by the amount of overdue work. Honesty is a character trait that we should strive for, but we also need to strive to create relationships that cultivate honest conversations. Being honest is hard work but being known as a person of integrity adds much to your character. We tend to want to hide the truth when things are not going as planned or when we think we will disappoint people. Being honest in a relationship builds trust. Our homes, offices, and classrooms can be spaces where it’s safe to tell the truth. Spaces where we reach out to one another. Where telling the truth is honored and help and hope are offered. Spaces where condemnation and criticism drip from the lips of those in attendance do not value…
Free Table Talk Conversation Starter Questions
Are you more like a pencil or a school bus? I love to ask people conversation starter questions like this one! I have asked it around the dinner table, to help a student prepare for an interview, on an airplane, in line at an amusement park, at gatherings, walking down the beach, and many more places to people both young and old. Mostly I just love to get people thinking and talking. I always ask them to give one reason to support their answer. I have heard plenty of interesting answers, the best being from my daughter who said she was sharp like a pencil but you never knew when she might snap! Why ask conversation starter questions If you think this is just a silly idea, let me explain. Conversation starter questions like this cause one to think about a pencil and then to think about a school bus. Probably floods of memories come when they think about their own experience with buses or lack of experience. Then they have to think about themself and what they want to review or hide about themself when they answer. Next, they have to evaluate both options and analyze the object and…
Tailor Joy Together
Ever wondered what the benefits are of having a personal tailor? Tailors Tailors make adjustments on the spot and look for inconsistencies. They understand that selecting the right fabric to suit the environment and occasion gives you a big advantage. Tailors creatively highlight their clients’ personal style. They save you time and money overall. You feel more confident in clothes that fit and flatter. Did you know the Bible talks about God gifting some people to be tailors? Take a look at Exodus 28:3. Tailor Joy Tailoring joy works much the same way. The benefits of tailored joy are smiling more and sighing less. People who tailor their attitudes and actions to cultivate joy in everyday life are reaping the benefits personally and professionally. Navigating the ups and downs is challenging. Choosing to count your blessings no matter what the day brings is one way to tailor joy today. Having joy can significantly impact your emotions, overall confidence, and even the direction of your day. Joy is a gift from God. Joy is our strength! It helps you smile more and sigh less. Sometimes it’s just a little tip or reminder that can significantly impact your day. Such as having…